After reading this article on cracked.com about how society has trained men to hate women, I began to wonder...what do men think ugly women should do with our lives? End them?
Clearly, men think that it's our duty as women to be gorgeous and if we aren't, we've betrayed them somehow....but there is no help for some of us, so what are we to do? The article cites some of the world's most powerful women
and how they're not considered beautiful and how much anger and hatred
they suffer from others as a result, as if all they've done for the world is nothing because they are ugly.
Go to any "men's rights" website or subreddit and you'll see the same thing: women criticized in extremely harsh ways if they're not beautiful and sexy, no matter what their accomplishments. Of course, if they are beautiful and sexy, they are still harshly criticized for having the audacity to exist as anything but sex toys. It's not enough for men to just see an ugly woman and say, "Eh, I wouldn't hit that, but whatever." They are flat out ANGRY that ugly women exist.
So, my question is, what are we supposed to do? Kill ourselves? I can accept the
idea that I'm not attractive, that no man wants me, that I should just become asexual because I'll never get a guy....but I don't feel like I shouldn't exist.....but apparently men think I shouldn't....and if I choose to exist, I should never leave the house because my sheer presence insults them. Worse, should I have the gall to both exist AND leave the house once in a while, then I should accept that I'm going to be viciously attacked for having the nerve to be alive and to have DNA that made me look how I do. I shouldn't try to make a decent life for myself or at all try to make the world a better place, because afterall, at the end of the day, I am still ugly.
What do these men think the answer is? Seriously? Do they think ugly women should just commit suicide?
Saturday, March 31, 2012
Tuesday, March 20, 2012
Ugly Girl vs Ugly Guy
I wanted to specify this as a place of expression for GIRLS for a reason. It's clear to anyone who's being honest and looking at it clearly, it's harder to be an ugly girl than it is an ugly guy. I won't say it's EASY for guys, but it's still easier than it is for girls.
An ugly guy is told to be cherished for who he is. He might not be hot, but he's intelligent, kind, generous, funny, etc., so you should look past his exterior. Females are not afforded this courtesy. Only if she is hot, or at least reasonably "cute" is it considered a bonus for her to be intelligent, kind, generous, funny, etc. Looks are always what matters first for women.
We also see it in advertising, TV, magazine covers, and so on. Haven't you noticed how weight loss ads feature women way more often than men? How about cosmetic surgery and anti-aging products? How about magazines? You open up a men's magazine, it's full of half naked women. You open up a women's magazine and you'd swear they just photocopied the men's magazine and pasted different articles on top.
How often do you people watch? When you do, how often do you see a hot woman with a not-so-hot man? Compare that to how rarely you see the opposite. How often do you see or hear an ugly guy you know personally talking about how he won't date "fat chicks" or "ugly chicks?" Yet, he thinks because he's a man, it's okay for him to be ugly because he's any one of the aforementioned adjectives...and people encourage him to do so! They tell him what a great guy he is, how any woman would be lucky to have him and he'll find the perfect woman one day....and she'll be hot too.
If a woman has physical flaws, shes told to "get real," to lower her standards, take what she can get, that beggars can't be choosers, that looks aren't everything, that he's, "Such a (nice adjective) guy, you should give him a chance," even though last time he was photographed he got all the Big Foot hunters all excited. It seems like this is the case even if the woman's flaws a minimal and the man's flaws are maximal.
It sucks, it's unfair, there's no denying it.
I don't want to discriminate against ugly men, tell them they have things "easy," or tell them they are not welcomed here, but because females have things so much more difficult in this area, I want to make this place special just for us.
An ugly guy is told to be cherished for who he is. He might not be hot, but he's intelligent, kind, generous, funny, etc., so you should look past his exterior. Females are not afforded this courtesy. Only if she is hot, or at least reasonably "cute" is it considered a bonus for her to be intelligent, kind, generous, funny, etc. Looks are always what matters first for women.
We also see it in advertising, TV, magazine covers, and so on. Haven't you noticed how weight loss ads feature women way more often than men? How about cosmetic surgery and anti-aging products? How about magazines? You open up a men's magazine, it's full of half naked women. You open up a women's magazine and you'd swear they just photocopied the men's magazine and pasted different articles on top.
How often do you people watch? When you do, how often do you see a hot woman with a not-so-hot man? Compare that to how rarely you see the opposite. How often do you see or hear an ugly guy you know personally talking about how he won't date "fat chicks" or "ugly chicks?" Yet, he thinks because he's a man, it's okay for him to be ugly because he's any one of the aforementioned adjectives...and people encourage him to do so! They tell him what a great guy he is, how any woman would be lucky to have him and he'll find the perfect woman one day....and she'll be hot too.
If a woman has physical flaws, shes told to "get real," to lower her standards, take what she can get, that beggars can't be choosers, that looks aren't everything, that he's, "Such a (nice adjective) guy, you should give him a chance," even though last time he was photographed he got all the Big Foot hunters all excited. It seems like this is the case even if the woman's flaws a minimal and the man's flaws are maximal.
It sucks, it's unfair, there's no denying it.
I don't want to discriminate against ugly men, tell them they have things "easy," or tell them they are not welcomed here, but because females have things so much more difficult in this area, I want to make this place special just for us.
Monday, March 19, 2012
It's okay to be ugly
It gets so old.
"You just need to be confident."
"You just need to smile more."
"You just need to wear nicer clothes."
"You just need to see yourself as beautiful first."
Of course, thebullshit "advice" is almost always from someone who has NO IDEA what it's like to be ugly. Of course they think they know the secret to not being ugly...they're not ugly! Few of them realize it, but whenever people tell us this "advice" it doesn't help. In fact, it demeans us even more.
The only thing worse than being ugly is being told to live in a constant state of denial. We're already treated like second class citizens for being ugly, now we have to be treated like we're crazy too, as if all of the things people have said and done to us to inform us of our genetic inferiority are all in our heads. Surely, NO ONE could say things that cruel, you must be exaggerating, there's no way, you must have heard them the wrong way, you're just taking it the wrong way.
Sound familiar?
Forgetting what all the beautiful people say, let's get real for a minute. The harsh truth is that we are not ALL BEAUTIFUL. If we were, models wouldn't exist nor would they be envied. Guys wouldn't all flock to the same handful of girls at a party. *WE* wouldn't notice how much crappier we were treated by most people. It seems like people almost bully us into "accepting" we're "beautiful" when everyone with eyes knows that we're not.
So, what can we do? Contrary to society's OMG-YOU-HAVE-TO-SEE-YOURSELF-AS-HOT bullying, we need to feel it out. Accept that you're not hot. It's okay not to be hot and to know it. It's okay to express that you're not hot. The way you've been treated because of your looks is not imaginary nor is it your fault. The idea that you have to see yourself as hot only feeds into the idea that looks are the only thing that matter about a woman (which is another thing people who think they're being helpful don't realize they're telling you).
You don't get over things by pretending they didn't happen. People know this about every other unfortunate situation in life, but when it comes to beauty, no one gets it. Please, for your own sanity, realize it's okay to feel the way you do. It may help to subscribe to the Diary of an Ugly Girl subreddit and share your feelings, stories, advice, and anything that you think might be helpful to others like you.
It might not be much, but it's a start. You don't have to feel crazy for believing what you know is true. There are many women like you out there and most of them are too afraid to admit it because they know they'll just get belittled into being quiet.
You're not alone!
"You just need to be confident."
"You just need to smile more."
"You just need to wear nicer clothes."
"You just need to see yourself as beautiful first."
Of course, the
The only thing worse than being ugly is being told to live in a constant state of denial. We're already treated like second class citizens for being ugly, now we have to be treated like we're crazy too, as if all of the things people have said and done to us to inform us of our genetic inferiority are all in our heads. Surely, NO ONE could say things that cruel, you must be exaggerating, there's no way, you must have heard them the wrong way, you're just taking it the wrong way.
Sound familiar?
Forgetting what all the beautiful people say, let's get real for a minute. The harsh truth is that we are not ALL BEAUTIFUL. If we were, models wouldn't exist nor would they be envied. Guys wouldn't all flock to the same handful of girls at a party. *WE* wouldn't notice how much crappier we were treated by most people. It seems like people almost bully us into "accepting" we're "beautiful" when everyone with eyes knows that we're not.
So, what can we do? Contrary to society's OMG-YOU-HAVE-TO-SEE-YOURSELF-AS-HOT bullying, we need to feel it out. Accept that you're not hot. It's okay not to be hot and to know it. It's okay to express that you're not hot. The way you've been treated because of your looks is not imaginary nor is it your fault. The idea that you have to see yourself as hot only feeds into the idea that looks are the only thing that matter about a woman (which is another thing people who think they're being helpful don't realize they're telling you).
You don't get over things by pretending they didn't happen. People know this about every other unfortunate situation in life, but when it comes to beauty, no one gets it. Please, for your own sanity, realize it's okay to feel the way you do. It may help to subscribe to the Diary of an Ugly Girl subreddit and share your feelings, stories, advice, and anything that you think might be helpful to others like you.
It might not be much, but it's a start. You don't have to feel crazy for believing what you know is true. There are many women like you out there and most of them are too afraid to admit it because they know they'll just get belittled into being quiet.
You're not alone!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)